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Tuesday, May 6, 2008

On My Soapbox Again...




Ok here I go again....

I have been looking into adopting through the state, just looking at all our options. So I call to talk with someone today and ask some questions. The first woman passed me onto a second woman who was very helpful.

Ok, so here's the deal.... we saw 3 Asian children, siblings, waiting for a family and our interest was peaked due to the fact that we have a very soft spot for Asians. :) Now apparently, although these children are older, 4,7, & 9, they are "giving priority" to a Cambodian family! Now how many Cambodian families living in USA are looking to adopt?! I would think not a whole lot! So these poor children must continue to wait for their forever family because a caseworker wants a "perfect" situation for them. Don't we all! But let's face it, life is not perfect. I'm sure these kids would take less than "perfect" if it meant a loving family willing to teach them about their culture and heritage. But hey, what do I know?!

Also, I was told although a bill was passed by Clinton when he was in office against this, a majority of caseworkers will not approve or allow transracial adoptions for their children. I understand the pros and cons on both sides but again, as I said above, if there aren't enough families willing to adopt then allow these children the opportunity to have a family, no matter what color they are!

Of course with any adoption there are many hoops and reams of paperwork to complete. I was told depending on the caseworker the legally free childrens adoption could take anywhere from 6 months up to 3 years! Wowzers!

My point in my rant is this...if you are all about the children, their well being and wanting their best than a loving family is for their best. Stop putting up more hurdles for us parents that just want to give a child a home! The older they get the harder it is to find a family for them. Why make them wait just because mom and dad may be White and the kids are Asian or African American or Hispanic?

Go to Adoptuskids.org and look at the hundreds of kids waiting. Kids just wanting a family to call their own. A family to love them, play ball with them, take them to the park, laugh with them and make new, happy memories. It makes me sad and then angry, very angry. Something needs to change. There needs to be a better system in place so these kids can get "home".

Climbing down now....

12 comments:

Lisa said...

Amen, Lisa.

Brandi said...

Don't climb down girl. . keep on speaking! That is absolutely ridiculous. It's a wonder that int'l adoptions are getting to the point that they may actually be EASIER than adopting through our own country, children who have ALREADY been declared orphans and matching them to families who have ALREADY been approved to parent them! aaagh!!!!

I'm with you girl!

Brandi

Wife to the Rockstar said...

BLOWS me away. We wanted to adopt through the state... and GUESS WHAT?? They said they would never approve us... because we already have too many kids. There are THOUSANDS of kids needing homes in our state... not too many willing to take any of them... yet we are deemed not good enough.

Stepping Out of the Boat said...

Preach it, Sista! And keep on preaching it from that mountaintop!!!!

Major Mom said...

Girl...Let me tell you. After we lost MJ in our Haiti thing, we applied for a child in foster care in the US. She was a black infant with "unspecified" special needs. They wouldn't tell us her needs, only let us submit our paperwork for her??...Anyway, we weren't chosen because we had 2 children and because another family applied in which the mom was a nurse. Ok, so how does her being a working mom/nurse make her more qualified to parent this child? Because she was black...whatev

Melissa :) said...

This is so sad. So very sad. And ultimately who pays the price? The children. Again. And again, & again. Breaks my heart.

Tereasa said...

Hello, I am new to your blog. I hope you don't mind if I offer my two cents. I agree that the adoption process, within the states particularly, can be frustrating. A lot of the expectations put on adoptive parents are unfair, not only for us, but also for the children awaiting those families. (For example, it seems completely unfair to me not to approve the Rockstar's family based on its size.) I do believe, however, that there is often a perfect family for certain children. If the workers do their job well, they will keep that in mind. Hopefully the result will be a successful adoption, i.e. no disruption or abuse. Perhaps it is best for the worker to have a sketch of what they feel would be a successful placement, allowing room for change of course. I found it was my job to listen to the worker's case and then prove that we were the right family. Waiting children need parents who will fight for them to receive the services and resources they need. We might as well start by fighting to be their parents.

Susan said...

Thanks Lisa for visiting my blog...it is new and kind of in the making. We are moving back to the States soon, so our life is kind of crazy now. I would LOVE to adopt a little Japanese (or half Japanese girl) but leave that desire in God's hands as He has closed the door. Your little Korean kids are adorable. I am sure God wll bless you for opening your home and heart to these these sweet pairs of oriental eyes.

Susan said...

Thanks Lisa for visiting my blog...it is new and kind of in the making. We are moving back to the States soon, so our life is kind of crazy now. I would LOVE to adopt a little Japanese (or half Japanese girl) but leave that desire in God's hands as He has closed the door. Your little Korean kids are adorable. I am sure God wll bless you for opening your home and heart to these these sweet pairs of oriental eyes.

Tereasa said...

Thanks for stopping by! I hope to see more of you in the future!

pearly1979 said...

Boy do I agree with you on this! It is such a shame. I see it all the time on adoptuskids with Native American children. It is so sad and foolish.

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