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Thursday, June 18, 2009

Nolan's 1st Gotcha Day

At this time last year we were praying fervently for God to intervene. We had started the day thinking that Nolan's birthmom, was in the hospital awaiting a C-section and we were only hours away from holding our precious new blessing. However, instead of the "Congratulations" call we were expecting, we received a call from the agency rep informing us that she could not find the birthmother and there was no record of her being at the hospital. Then she proceeded to tell me that it might have all been a scam and she may have never been pregnant! Oh.My! I can still feel those emotions that were swirling in my gut, all the questions I had. BUT GOD! For some odd reason (as this is NOT my normal demeanor) I was relatively calm during those hours of unknown. Sean and I gathered many, many times during those hours, held hands and just prayed our hearts out and honestly, our prayers weren't just for us. We were praying for the birthmom as we didn't know where she was, if she was ok (because she had a variety of health needs that endangered her and the baby) and for her heart. I had grown to love this woman....deeply. We talked many hours on the phone and she was carrying this child for me. I loved to hear her laugh or when she shared an incident that one of her other children did or when I was able to listen to her very young daughter singing into the phone. Our hearts were knit, whether the child was mine or hers no longer mattered. She was not a stranger. She was not "one of those" kinds of people to me. She was a sister of my heart.

That long awaited phone call did finally come around 5 o'clock that evening. All we were told was "get in your car and start driving. Call us when you are close to the city and we will tell you where we will meet". Of course, we were nervous, anxious, worried, confused.... Sean wasn't certain we should go, what if it was a scam. We prayed, took a deep breath, corralled the children and put Zack and Ryan in charge. We had no idea what would go down, how long we would be or even if we would return with a baby but we HAD to see what God had in store. And let me tell was GOOD! After driving (in rush hour traffic in Philadelphia) we had to locate our meeting place, a tiny hotel only designated with an equally tiny sign! When we walked in there sat a woman. She said "is this what you are looking for?" then she proceeded to pull the blue cover off of the tiniest baby with the most beautiful hair! LOL! That was it for me. I was in LOVE! I couldn't fathom how here he was in my arms when hours ago we thought he didn't even exist! Only God, my friends, only God! Sean was not so easily won (he's my skeptic!) He actually did not hold Nolan until after ALL the paperwork was signed and we were free to leave. I believe it was around 12 AM when Sean finally swooped his newest son into his arms and wept. What a sight....

Nolan had some health complications and some pretty big health concerns when he came home but God healed him, completely! The birthmom had actually given birth 11 days earlier and had left the hospital early and taken him home. Who could have blamed her?! I can't even begin to imagine what she was thinking or feeling. Yes, she was not completely honest with me or the agency but again, I can't judge her. I haven't walked in her shoes (thank God!) The whole point, the only one that really matters here, is that God chose Nolan for our family. I totally believe when she became pregnant God had already predestined Nolan for our home. He knew when we were upset that it was taking so long to find a baby, when we felt like giving up, when our hearts couldn't take one more no, that we would be fine because Nolan was to be ours. All those months we waited anxiously for "the call", all the work I put in to finding a situation, any situation, the agencies I spoke with, the wonderful referral service ladies that would call with situations that we turned down because of the high fees, all that time God was knitting our babe together in his mother's womb. How short-sighted we are most times!

Unfortunately, at this point the only contact I have with birthmom is thru letters and pictures I send to her. We spoke not too long after Nolan was home and she gave me her phone number and I have her address as well. We have an open adoption however, at this point she isn't ready. She is still healing. She is missing a piece of her heart. You see, part of her heart walks around my home, he laughs, he loves, his name is Nolan Elijah! And he truly is one of the 7 best gifts God has ever given me!!

Happy Gotcha Day to my precious gift from God! We love you so very, very much!! Thank you Lord. Thank you for having our hopes, dreams and lives safe in the palm of Your hand. You are a Good God!


crispy said...

Lisa, this is such a joy to read. I don't even want to say I understand all the emotions and feelings that you felt that day. But God is faithful and He knew the outcome. What a beautiful story. May God bless little Nolan and your family. May He have a high calling on his life. May God use him in mighty way to be a positive example for Him.

Thanks for sharing.

And happy Gotcha Day.

love, cris

Charity said...

I remember hearing about this! We were putting together those home prayer groups, and when I called you about something, you were telling me about it. I know we don't ever get to talk, but I love seeing you guys come in with your whole troop of kids! They're so joyful!

Wife to the Rockstar said...

I remember this time like it was yesterday!

Cannot believe it is one year!

somebody said...