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Thursday, November 11, 2010

For all the mommies in the trenches....

....doing the hard things not many others choose to do.....
...loving a child or two that choose (often!) not to be lovable....
....that cry out to God over and over and over again for their child to be healed from their past....
...that have children that use their bowel movements and urine as "control" and you are so very tired of dealing with yet another time of the child exerting their "control", especially at this age....
....that deal with a downpour of lies daily and although the child/ren knows lying is wrong and will always be followed by discipline, they still choose that.....
...somedays it's hard to see the real child underneath all the yuck they bury themselves under...
...you will never judge another family that disrupts because you have thought about it yourself too many times to           count....
...taking a long term view of parenting this child causes lots of emotions, many of them not good....
....being honest with others causes them to look at you with doubt and confusion because the child you are talking about always seems like "such a sweet, behaved child"....
...when you are so tired of living in this perpetual state of frustration....
...when your child purposefully hurts their siblings but shows no remorse or guilt...
....when your child looks at you with that blank stare and doesn't "get" what you are talking about....
....when an "uplifting" phone call is when your close friend, who also has a child with RAD, calls and you vent, cry, and share together...and you don't feel so alone in this battle...
...sigh...

To all you mommies, side by side in this trench with me....may God give you His strength today to love this child, in spite of, his words, actions and behaviors, a glimmer of hope in progress today even if it is teeny, tiny, and joy...maybe in another childs' smile, or a beautiful flower, or a scribbled drawing a child makes for you...

God does have a plan in all of this....in the pain...the tears...the frustrations...the questions...the anger...the fears....God is BIGGER than all these things and He really, truly does love us and that child. When the going gets rough, remember, God has equipped us with EVERYTHING we need to do this job. Lean into HIM and allow Him to carry you as you carry that child.

Keep on keepin' on mommies......from one momma whose tired to the core but too stubborn to quit!! :)


3 comments:

Acceptance with Joy said...

Thanks! I'm thinking I'm probably right in the same section of the trench as you.

Blessings!

NeeCee said...

Thank you. I really needed to read this. I'm tired to the bone and there seems to be no stopping of the behaviors lately. I'm beginning to get twitchy!

Dana said...

It is sooooo tough.... especially when they are physically hurting others.
Hang in there!